When our flight from Hartford to Chicago got stuck in a thunderstorm, 100 feet from the jetway, the pilot announced we’d be there for a while.
So I said, screw this. I’m flying the plane myself!
(Nah, but they gave a nice tour of the cockpit. And the hat kept sliding down my nose. You can’t see the glass of white wine I was sipping. I figured it wasn’t really legal.)